Art of Lying

Well yes, lying is an art, though only people who get caught while lying seem to know it. They only understand how tough and skillful the art of lying is. It needs a man with common sense and commanding presence of mind to speak a lie.

I admit I am a liar and a seasoned one at that. Well that's nothing unusual, we all lie or I assume most of us do. It is just that some people never accept it. There are some who even claim that they don't lie, they have never lied in their life, and this is something I find hard to believe. Those who claim to be always honest and truthful may never have been in any difficult situation. This is something I can bet upon.

Usually we all lie in a trying situation; lying is an easy option. Here I am not talking about habitual liars, those who lie without purpose, just for the sake of it. For instance, there are some individuals if you ask them what they are reading they will answer "history" hiding the "geography" book. This post is not for them. This one is for sincere liars. People who lie when needed.

Personally I feel nothing wrong with lying, if it's not intentional. I have been doing it since childhood, since the time I can remember my first school. It all started with pranks in the bus on our way to school and back home. The driver complained, whenever he caught us and for our defiance lying was the only option. Later on as our pranks increased so did our frequency of lying and as they say "practice makes a man perfect" we achieved near perfection. If we ever got caught and were called in to the principal's office, we would never go to him straight; would always meet up before going in, decide what and how to lie, who would speak what and then with weary, ignorant faces we'll would enter the office, as if thought we were the most innocent kids GOD ever produced. Several times the bus guys used to get kicked because of us.

Subsequently we learnt that a liar should have a very good memory and a good understanding of the nature of the individual one is dealing with and his/her emotional weaknesses along with the commanding presence of mind needed for lying. Lying is safe if performed alone but in groups it requires precaution, coordination and proper communication. There are some fools (every group has one) who speak without thinking and make everyone suffer. The important thing is to identify such stupid-teammates, and be ordered to keep their mouth shut. Initially we suffered a lot due to this but once we traced who made a mistake, they were strictly prohibited from speaking. It all worked out fine. Basics learnt in the childhood worked very well in teenage and later in college.

One more precaution to be taken during lying is its repetition. A lie looses its credibility if repeated more then twice. Two grandmas' can be in the ICU at a time but not three. So I made it a point to be the first one to give excuse if 15 others are involved in class bunks. Obviously, one who would wait till the end would be left with no reliable excuse (haste should be in the minds of expert liars, not in action and expression). The whole charm of lying lies in novelty.

When I established myself firmly in this field of lying, then I practiced honesty (woh kya kehte hein “Sau choohe khaa kar billi haj ko chali” Had no other quote in English !!!) restricting to minimum lies. Lies don't work wherever personal relationships are concerned. It hurts and it hurts badly, sometimes the being damage irreparable. In relationships, hiding the truth is almost as heinous a crime as lying; also it erodes trust which is very difficult to build up again. So I think it's better to face the anger instead of lying.

But professionally, it's a necessity, minimum 2 or 3 lies a day otherwise I feel hard to maintain the job. Now what they say in management lingo: communication skills, social engineering, all these things are a revised, refined version of lying. What to speak, to whom, when and how it all depends on the conscience and common sense of the person. Like any other art, lying needs practice and concentration.

"Any fool can tell the truth, but it needs a man of some sense to know how to tell lie": Samuel Butler